blame canada

Why is it so difficult to date someone? I blame Hollywood for it all. In the movies we see the protagonist find the girl of his dreams, once the conflict is resolved the movie ends. We assume they live happily ever after. What we don't see is that in two year's time they've drifted apart and want different things. Usually the girl wants to have kids while the guy doesn't think that's such a great idea (for whatever reason, all legitimate). That's not in the movies because that doesn't sell, we all want that fairytale relationship. You meet at some innocuous locale (the coffee shop we frequent), there's some minor obstacles we have to overcome together and then the rest of the relationship is smooth sailings. It takes a lot of work, more work than I'm willing to put into it for just some random girl. Sure it's fun for about the first two weeks but that's it. I don't want to exchange keys, I don't want to have to buy a second supply of toiletries to stock at her place, and I certainly don't want to have to split my time between our places and friends. She doesn't have to meet my family, we don't make joint plans for the holidays and we don't settle down. Bad plan? Probably.
I'm not that bad OK? I'd get in my car and drive cross-country to surprise her, or jump on a plane and fly across an ocean but only if they're worth it. You know if they're worth it too from the get go. Most aren't. For friends and family I've driven (or rode in the Casey, Illinois incident) a day to see, I've gone broke for them but it's because they're worth it. Some members of my family I won't do that for (sad but true) but others I would go to the ends of earth for. I've certainly thought that some girls were worth it but found out that the feeling was not mutual. Plus it's sort of stalker-ish to fly to another place and surprise them. Sure it's in those romance movies, but it's also in the horror movies. Apparently there's a thin line between the two.

Of course I have been speaking hypothetically...