it's not you, it's me

You've got mail and gonorrhea! That's just not cool. I mean, what's the subject line on that email? "Got itching down there?" Some of those emails are kinda funny, but is it really the time to try to make someone laugh? I mean, they might have an STD. I guess the next logical step is to have a text message service. "You're too hot to be out of action. I got diagnosed with an STD since we played. You might want to get checked too." In Espanol too!

I wonder if they followed UXO procedures. It's just one of those things that I think about when I read about this stuff. And honestly, who uses landmines in their backyard? A Vietnam vet? Not all of them are crazy like that. Still, that must've have been fun.

This is the humor that a college graduate can generate? Yeah, obviously you can't just put blah blah blah, 137 times. That's not funny, that's just stupid. You can A) interject it every once and awhile. B) change it up with some yada, yada, yada. C) Make it funny. "Blah, blah, blah. Give money. We're helping blah, blah, blah. Then, yada, yada, yada.

Yeah! That's because everyone is racist, not just people in western Pennsylvania. I mean, even receipts are racists. About the receipt, what the hell is mall security going to do about it? I mean, they're not the FBI, it's mall security. They handle rowdy teens in the food court, not deal with civil liberties violations.

This one would be hard to explain to the insurance company. I wonder if that's covered, I mean, who has meteorite insurance? I should call my guys to see if I'm covered. Aww, nevermind, it's not space debris. Just crap falling off of planes (which doesn't sound good either).

All I can say is that it was funny. I actually laughed. And for the record, I've been using the term "equal opportunity offender" to describe me for awhile.

WHAT? THE? F***? OK, I wasn't going to buy the game, but it's music might accidentally offend Muslims? Well, I'm not saying that it's the wrong thing to do but really? I guess commonsense is really not all that common. Rated 'M' for Muslim.