tiny dancer

Huh. I almost feel bad, but then I remember that I once was switching channels to old fashion way (channel up, pause, channel up, pause, etc) and I came across her reality show. Anyone remember that crap? So like a train wreck, I was disguised by the horror yet couldn't change the channel. The show actually made me vomit. Not the "threw up a little in my mouth" sort but actual flee to the bathroom photo finish kind. Granted I was sick with a little food poisoning but I still consent that it was the show. Makes it stick more doesn't it? I guess wishes do come true.

I felt good about our 6 inches of snow. To record I think we've had a total of nine here this year, but this is just ridiculous. Teachers aren't working, kids aren't learning, but I bet some people are just having a blast. My friends and I have this 'tradition' that whenever it snows and we can all get together we find an unplowed parking lot. Then all the funness begins. One SUV, one ski rope, and one sled. There's nothing quite like getting pulled through the snow at 20mph, colliding with curbs, and the possibility of cracking a skull. It started back in 1999 when Bill and I attempted this crazy stunt. Somehow I was able to locate every single curb and concrete parking bump in the parking lot, usually with my ass. We also used to propel ourselves into the chain-link fences. A few times we tried to do an uphill pull, but that always ended with us doing a face plow. *gasp* I just had the most brilliant idea (or a new way to kill ourselves). In said parking lots, we spend a little time building snow ramps before we tear up the place. Oh yeah, we're making the news and not in the good way.

I'm not going to make fun of autism because that's just not cool. They can't help it. Yeah, sometimes they do funny things but still to make fun of it outright is cruel. However, I'd like to direct your attention to the bottom of the webpage where CNN gives you the chance to receive "Related Topics" email alerts. Yes, autism is one of them. The other one though is for the CDC. And how exactly is autism a controllable disease and preventable? Unless we take one out of Carlos Mencia's playbook. "If you're Dee, and she's Dee, and you have sex. Your kid's going to be Dee Dee Dee."

Ah yes. Parenting. It's a subtle thing isn't it? I mean, if you ask one group, they'll tell you that fighting is wrong and try to resolve conflicts with diplomacy. Another group will tell you to stand up for yourself and toughen up. This mom though is in a whole different league. Ha, I remember getting my ass kicked in school, then coming home and my mom kicking my ass for getting into a fight at school. Apparently it was a two-for-one day. OK, she didn't kick my ass but she inflicted a good spanking.



Last weekend I had my Army Reserve drill. Sorry, battle assembly. Although we did assemble, it wasn't for the purpose of battle. I got to do my re-certification as a combat lifesaver. Sadly, I've actually used what I've learned in combat to try to save a life. Operative word in that sentence was "try." Batting average? 0-1. Anyway, there's been significant changes to the course since I took it back in 2002. Better or worse I don't know. It does focus more on the things that you'll come across in combat, rather than the civilian world so there's that. GSWs, tension pneumothorax, and that sort.
On the other hand, the training and presentation was developed by the Army. So there's a slide that lists the actions a combat lifesaver should take. Some are obvious, but some are for practical purposes, and some are just flat out stupid. "Return fire, suppress the enemy" that makes sense, but not usually something you'd do in that situation. "Reassure the casualty." Obvious. Then there's "Don't get shot." Flat out stupid. Really? You mean that getting shot doesn't do anyone any good? Brilliant strategy!
Another point of hilarity was when we were learning about the new pressure dressing. Yeah, it's cool and much easier to use (albeit complex at first) but I won't go into its application. Rather, the presentation of it. It was a short video where the guy that made it is demonstrating how to use it. OK, it comes inside of two packages to keep it really sterile. Got it. Oh, there's four notches in the package to facilitate removal. You can use your hands or your mouth. Then he shows how one would use your mouth to tear open the package. *gasp* Amazing! It was like magic. This next part I found incredibly funny. I don't know if it was because I hadn't had breakfast had I'd been up for five hours at this point or what. He removed the bandage from its packaging and said, "it comes in sandwich form." This sparked my interest. Like ice cream, it comes in a cone or 'sandwich form.' You could either apply it to the wound or have the casualty eat it, I guess.


I really don't know if I should comment on this subject, I feel some sort of need to say something. Especially since this is all going on in Massachusetts where gay marriage is legal. Well, more on this later.