twjwd

That's what Jesus would do. Right? I mean, there's ads prior to the movie that say "Don't talk." What else was the guy supposed to do? Still, I gotta wonder if the most important question is: "do we need to know what movie it was?" Does that matter? I suppose it's free publicity for the movie. "So good, people are getting shot over it."

Boo! This sucks. It was a classic. Now I suppose they're going to make the movie, Radio Flyer 2.0. Argh. What the hell? A 5-point safety harness? MP3 player? Holy crap.

A water-powered alarm clock? Um, OK. And $5 for a tire gauge? What the hell kind of tire gauge are you getting? Does it refill the air too? Crap.

Barf!

people consider it

It's the most wonderful time of the year. Me, I plan for the worse. I think it was a terrorist attack, I bet any minute now Hamas will take responsibility for the 'accident.' Yup, then we'll raise the threat level and the President will tell us that there are terrorist sleeper cells within the United States and to look out for other such 'accidents' throughout the country for the next couple of weeks.

Really? "Amtrak train strikes, kills woman." Like the Amtrak train had a mind of its own. Yup, the train just jumped off the tracks and hit a woman. Luckily for investigators, the train remained at the scene. No, these stories should be titled, "Dumbass stands on train tracks, expected ending."

Well, for Christmas Eve I tracked Santa on the NORAD tracks Santa site.  I also was prepared for Santa when he was spotted in the area.  People thought I was crazy, but in retrospect I think I did the right thing. That guy dressed up as Santa and killed a lot of people. Am I wrong to be worried?

Even though it doesn't relate to the holiday season, this story is funny. Nothing funny about strip searches but rather by lawyer's statement "She couldn't bring anything into or out of the cell, so why do they need to strip-search her twice a day? It makes no sense at all," he said." Well, if she's on suicide watch but allowed to go in and out of her cell for whatever reason guess what? To make sure she doesn't bring anything into or out of the cell she needs to get strip searched. Sorry, that's the way it is. Otherwise they could bring something harmful and then the family would sue because she killed herself while in custody.

Well, I don't know what criminal charges you could actually file in this instance. I mean, when they catch him. It seems pre-mediated because he passed up several other items that could've been stolen.

as previously stated

I'm man enough to admit that I'm wrong. There is someone apparently that would name their kid after ol' uncle Adolf. I'd like to point out that the reporter went out of their way to point out that they're of German descent. What does that matter? I think the bigger issue is that Wal*Mart has no problem with 'unique' names on cake. Sure they won't make a cake in the shape of a penis or other genitalia but Adolf Hitler Campbell is fine. What did the family expect when they named the kid? Hugs? Kisses?

Uh, I'm not sure if it'll work but go ahead and tax it. Obese? Taxing soda should cure that. Couldn't tax the fast food industry. Nope, they can't be blamed at all. What about vending machine food? Nope, those are as healthy as celery sticks. Huh, I guess you just gotta tax soda drinks that don't have 'diet' in front of them. What about 'lite' afterwards? Maybe there's another tax for Pibb Xtra. With a title like that you'd think there'd be more so that should be taxed more. How about Diet Dr. Pepper? I know it says diet in front of it but it tastes just like regular Dr. Pepper and that's how it's advertised.

That is one awesome 'Dear Santa' letter. All I gotta say is that kid is going to get a buttload of presents this year. It's a selfless letter, how could Santa refuse?

Ah, I know what I'm giving people for Xmas this year. Well, crappy presents disguised as awesome presents. Ho-ho-ho. 

extreme laughter

And I thought I was really messed up. How is that a 'quick' way to make a buck? $13,000? That's it? For two kids? Sure they're from messed up parents but you could probably get a better price. And for the record, there really shouldn't be a law against selling babies BECAUSE THAT'S NOT COOL! That's like passing a law against putting your finger in an electric socket or grabbing a hot pot with your bare hand. You just don't do that! There really should be a law against selling babies now.

What is wrong with them? I mean, they're in jail. You'd think that would be other things they'd offended by. You know, the high walls, crappy food, and overall standard of living.

I'd hate to think we'd discriminate against anyone. Truly. I mean, everyone should be made fun of, equally. I mean what's the problem? They were making fun of blind people? Or the man? I don't think he can take a joke, obviously. If he could, he'd be laughing. And besides, it's in a medium that he can't comprehend. What's the harm? Just put the thing on mute, it'll be like it never happened for him.

Well, I think this guy lost his job. Not cuz he got kidnapped but because he's not very good at it. I suppose it's because he got kidnapped. Still, that's just funny. Almost as funny as the kidnapping in 'Fargo.'

Crazy. Just crazy. That's just not a fair question. For two weeks? That's like saying people would give up sex for their cell phone for two weeks. Well, if people had the same amount of sex for the same duration that they used the Internet, that'd be a different story. It'd be an interesting question.

go ahead, laugh it up

Constipation is God's punishment for eating meat. The solution is cereal. They're gurrrr-eat!

Argh! More scientists being dumb. Or the media being stupid as well. I can't tell. Thanks for the verification people, now move on to something else. What's next? Proof of gravity? Newton would be proud. Or shamed, I dunno at this point.

Honestly, if you play anything enough you'd "break." Trust me, I know. My cousin Marcus put me through this back when he lived with me. Mariah Carey & Boyz II Men "One Sweet Day" was played almost continuously when it first came out. I don't know what that says about him, but for me I nearly went out of my mind. Complain all you want, but it is a valid method of interrogation.

Uh, yeah. I don't know what to think. Don't get me wrong, I think it's an impressive effort and I'm almost scared to ask how successful it's been in the past or if this was the first attempt. I mean, to copy a legitimate company vehicle as well as the effort it took law enforcement to track it is just astonishing. That's a ton of drugs, literally.

I think this was the point of those safe haven laws, where you can drop kids off at. Not the, drop a 17-year old off at. This is attempted murder, child negligent at best. You can't leave a baby like that, that is just not cool. Really? Abandoned babies fall under the Department of Human Resources? They don't have protective services? Geez, I'd hate to think that unemployment falls under the same category as abandoned babies.

back at it

We all have voices in our head. Most of them have valid points and bring up good ideas. Listen to them. Like how can anyone think that this is a good idea? There's a reason why he's a registered sex offender. I hope that she's OK, that she's safely passed out in her apartment. Still, when you train to run a marathon you sometimes think "oh, what's the worse thing that can happen to me?" Uh, well. THIS! I'm not saying that you shouldn't run a marathon. I'm saying be smart about it. Don't get lost in the crowd. Take a friend, run together with other people. Listen to the voices, you know, unless they tell you to kill someone.

Well, we knew that this was coming but there are so many fond memories. I'll miss them, but they are a bit out of place since digital cameras hit the scene. Actually, I'm kinda surprised they lasted this long against them. I bid you adieu Polaroid cameras.

I sometimes wonder why I donate to the NSF, I mean if they're going to do "research" on things we already know and in frivolous things I don't think I want to donate next year. I learned this is elementary school, a smile is contagious. Then I learned that it's not how many friends you have but the quality of friends. Both of these facts are known, but it takes research to realize that this applies to social networks too? Geez. I don't like the idea that is postulated at the end of the article. Basically you're saying that fat people have fat friends because they're fat. Can't have fat people interacting with the skinnies, nope that would be social suicide. 

Hey, I'm not knocking the idea. In fact, I think it's a good thing. Selling your hair to a company. Yeah, that's good stuff. Medical trials? Definitely, there's only so much research can do and at some point you need to test it on humans. Buying gold? Ha! That's just taking advantage of stupid people. Cash fluctuates, but gold is a better currency. Swindle the poor and stupid people. Good. The one thing I don't like is the guy that became a professional lab rat. Not the fact that he's putting experimental drugs into his system. Like I said, at some point we have to do that; I understand that. No, what I think is moronic is taking financial advice from a homeless person. Yeah I suppose it's like learning how to use a chainsaw from a guy with 8 fingers, but at the same time it makes you wonder if he's teaching your the right thing.

my couch

From my couch I ponder some of life's mysteries. I stare at my dry-erase board where I have scribed up calculus equations and contemplate astrophysics. The couch is where I control my TV watching (or it controls me). It's where I play my video games from and often times do my homework on. You could say that my couch is a part of my life. It is after all, where I eat my dinner too.

I'm a believer. I believe that any kid that is moved by the movie "Star Wars" likes to think that they're a Jedi Knight like Luke Skywalker. I believe that the automatic doors at the grocery store actually open because I wave my hand in front of me rather than detect my presence with a simple radar system. What? It moves after I wave my hand, that's the only explanation that I will accept.

Guys walks into the bank and look around for the security cameras. Not to make sure that they're safe, but because deep down (for about 30 seconds) we think we could actually rob the place. We're scoping out the place; casing the joint. Of course we don't because most of us fear getting caught, convicted, and sentenced to prison. Otherwise, we'd go for it.

The reason why stories and movies about superheroes are so appealing because we all want to be superheroes. Who wouldn't want to be a billionaire that secretly moonlights as a superhero? Or that a mild-mannered reporter (or office drone) could fly around faster than a speeding bullet or more powerful than a locomotive. I just don't think that any of us would sit in traffic rather than get out and fly to work.

All of us are dreamers.

what is that smell?

OK, while I agree that the ticket isn't the smartest idea I don't deny what the trooper did was a prudent action. People do things that make it harder for law enforcement to believe every story out there. People speed, when the cop asks them why they reply that they're going to the hospital. They don't know who they're visiting or which hospital but they're going there. People lie and that unfortunately makes things harder for the cops, is that right? No, but it is human. Cops aren't infallible, I wish they were but they're not. And as far as Ms. Brown is concerned, there is bias but not as much bull.

So easy a grandmother can do it. Well, I hope that she doesn't have to put on her reading glasses before she shoots. Then there's the issue of targeting. A bullet is no good if you can't hit anything. Well, that's not true you can scare someone with a stray bullet but since it's only a single shot it's not like you can back up the previous statement (shot) with more. All I can say is that more guns can only lead to more gun-related injuries and death. Hehe, I like that your doctor can prescribe you one. Seems like that'd be a conflict of interest, but doctors could use the business.

This just seems like a contradiction. Well f**k, what's the point of having the pageant if it's after-the-fact? I guess they're just early for next year. If the little Christian kids want to do a pageant about Jews that's fine, let them do that. If the little Muslim kids want to celebrate Eid al-Adha let them. Although I find it ironic, because Jews and Muslims acknowledge Jesus, but not as the Son of God but as another prophet, like Isaiah or Abraham. Eid al-Adha is the celebration of Abraham's willingness to sacrifice his son in the name of God. God intervenes at the last second. Oh, like the Bible story! Blah. Religion.

Yup. He was a "great boss" but just a little misunderstood. That must be it.