bring it off

They Brought It Again. You'd think after the 2nd one they'd quit. And yes, I've seen the 4th one. Why? Well, have you seen something so horrific that you have the stare at it? Like if someone blew their brains out with a .45 and it splats all over the wall behind them? It's like that, staring at the splatter stains to figure out where it all came from and what not. Well if you don't know, come over because after watching "Bring It On: In It To Win It" I might just blow out my brains. Not really, but it feels like that. I just wish I knew why I'm watching this crap.

tricycle

Danica McKellar was on HIMYM tonight. I had such a crush on her when I was a kid. I'm not kidding, honestly though who didn't love Winnie Cooper? What? And just because she's like super smart in Math isn't a total nerd turn-on, it's not like she's got a mathematical theorem named after her. Math doesn't suck! It's not like I'm obsessing over her. See how much I obsess? I'm not even going to point that at the end of the Pineapple Incident episode Ted said that he called her a left a voicemail, even though during tonight's episode he said he was too scared to call her after the Pineapple Incident. See? Not obsessing. I'm just glad they fit her in. How cool would it be if she turned out to be the "mother" in How I Met Your Mother?

Ah crap, now I've probably got to call my dad and talk. Uh, I mean, yay! Didn't buy it huh? Yeah, me neither.



On a serious note...
I'm touching upon this subject because I just wrote a paper in one of my criminal justice classes on what makes a cop and another on consolidation of police departments. The psych test is part of both. Still, I don't think that a psych test could've possibly prevented this. It's not like AR-15 rifles are banned in all states so it would be an easy purchase (you can get one for $600). And 30rds for 6 people? Not difficult either. I mean a pre-schooler could do the same amount of damage with a precision rifle like the AR-15. OK, maybe that's exaggerating details. My point is that you can't blame the psych test or lack thereof on this whole incident. Who would've thought that "worthless pig" would've made him snap? You can't blame police training on it either. 30rds for 6 people in a confined area? Please. That's 5 a piece. Now had he tossed in a flashbang and popped off 6 rounds for 6 people then, yeah, I'd blame the police training but that's not what happened.
I don't attribute his age as a factor either, like Steve Bocek blames either. You've never met a 20 year-old that was responsible enough to be a police officer? Tell you what Steve, go visit a military base. You've got 17 year olds shouldering that kind of responsibility, and well I might add.
Yes, it's sad, but don't blame others for the fault of one. He snapped. Nothing can change that. It was the police's fault, it wasn't even the kids that teased him. One man did this. Accept it.

moments of happiness

There are a few precious moments that can truly be classified as happiness. I've found one. Last night I went to Wal-Mart and picked up How I Met Your Mother (Season 2) at 12:30am. I also picked up Fantastic Four: Rising of the Silver Surfer as well as Superman/Doomsday.

Now, I'm sitting on the couch and watching How I Met Your Mother! Happiness...

spanish fry

Wow. If she does this then those guys that used to make fun of me can eat a sock. I don't know what that means but it'd be funny. Row across the Pacific. Interesting.

There's an old military running cadence about this. Very funny stuff, but not so much in real life. Well, they're all in heaven, a better place. No use crying about that.

And possibly the scariest story ever. Scarier than terrorists or bridges falling down, miners trapped in a mine, this is a bad idea. Well, a good idea really, don't want those senior citizens to get an STD.

I can't wait.

rockafeller skank

Swarley is one of my favorite HIMYM (How I Met Your Mother) episodes. Not because it marks the return of Marshall and Lily as a couple or for Morena Baccarin's appearance (though rest assured it didn't hurt). No, I speak from the heart when I say this. I just loved how the writers and producers just focused on driving in Barney's new nickname Swarley. It's one of those things I want to do at least once in my life. Not only did they drive it in but they did it creatively; phone calls and alternative names to Swarley (obvious), a radio dedication (less obvious), and magazine subscriptions (awesome). All of this was amplified by the fact that Barney was against the idea, he even tried to use reverse psychology to no avail, to get people to stop calling him Swarley.
In case you were wondering on the pronunciation of Swarley, it's like Bob Marley; as in Bob Swarley mon. Watch an episode for yourself and see. It's this week's episode.

disappointments

Well, tonight marked the end of an era. SCIFI Channel's Stargate SG-1 has come to an end. I'm here to spoil it all for those that haven't seen it, so if you don't want to know just scroll down and read some other stuff I've written. So the series finale episode wasn't all that spectacular. Don't get me wrong, I love the series and I understand that it has to continue so you can't do much, but they didn't do anything! The first fifteen minutes were awesome, the Asgard (as a race) died off but before they did, they went ahead and gave humanity the sum of the Asgard knowledge, plus cool new toys. The twist? The Ori were capable of tracking SG-1 because of the enhancements, and even though with the new toys they could destroy the Ori motherships, it still wasn't enough. Just as SG-1 was about to be destroyed Lt. Col. Carter was able to envelop the ship in a time-dilation field. So the for the next forty minutes, we watched SG-1 age fifty years while a fraction of a second in normal-time passed. Finally, they come up with a solution and save themselves. The last two minutes were a throwback to normal operations and the team walks through the gate one last time on screen.
Not to complain and not offer solutions, but there was so much more that could've been done with a two-hour series finale. Deal with the Asgard problem, the Ori too, maybe find a way to neutralize the supergate, something. Maybe inflict a little damage to the Ori fleet, spark some hope to remove the Ori followers from the galaxy. I don't know, I don't get paid to write those shows.
Still, not all is bad on the Stargate front. Amanda Tapping is moving to Stargate Atlantis. Also joining the crew is Jewel Staite, making an appearance in the Atlantis season finale. Yay! I've liked her since I saw her on Joss Whedon's Firefly. Woo! It appears as though Torri Higginson is leaving the show to make room for all the sexy. Makes a little sense, financially speaking, but otherwise I can't fathom why they'd do this. Still, should make for interesting stories.

it's so tru

So, I like TV. I really like TV. I like DVDs too. You get movies and tv shows all in the comfort of your home. With DVDs you get to choose when and where you get to watch, you can pause it and go to the bathroom, make a call, or whatever you need. There are no commercials on DVD, that's a big advantage. Sure you can do that now with the digital cable but it's just not the same. So with all of the advantages of DVDs over TV, why would I voluntarily choose to sit through a show marathon on TV when I own it on DVD? Or why I'd watch a movie (that I own) on TV with all the commercials and censures. I don't know, I can't explain it. I hate commercials, so you'd think that a TV marathon would be the last thing on my mind, but it's what I choose.


Sit back and enjoy my decent into craziness. It should be a fun ride.

six degrees

You ever played that game? Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon? Where you have to link any actor/actress to Kevin Bacon in six moves or less? Awesome game for those into movie trivia. Which actor co-starred with which other actor, so on and so forth. Well, we used to play this game out in Iraq back in 2003 before we had fancy things like electricity. So when we got back, I obviously looked up some of the more questionable connections because back then we couldn't verify answers. Results? I found this, the Oracle of Bacon. It's a wonderful thing, this technology stuff.

You got questions? Cecil's got answers. And books too. From stupid questions, to some profound stuff. Well, not profound really but things that you were always curious about but too ashamed to ask them. See what searching the web does for you?

Have you ever seen someone do the most horrible parking job and just wanted to scream at them? Here's the solution.

One of the worse excuses I've ever heard, and I've heard quite a few. Maybe not as much as a teacher but these are very colorful.

Really? The movie Brazil was higher on the list than Star Trek: The Next Generation? And Stargate/Stargate SG-1/Stargate Atlantis didn't even crack the Top 25? What kind of crazy world am I living in? Well, at least there's the Top 100.

lean back dirty

If nothing, it was an ingenious method. Granted you can't do that in this day and age. I mean, the only approved methods are quiet scolding and time out. School is like prison, you knock one out and the rest just fall in line. But nooooo, you can't do that huh? Fear is a good motivator, got me going all the way through high school. Thanks mom!

Technology may fuel stupidity. More cases of the good kind of stupid. I'm glad that young criminals are getting stupider. Maybe there's hope in the dark cloud of stupidity. I mean, seriously? Distributing video of a crime you filmed while committing? C'mon, why don't you just stop off at the police station right afterwards and save us all the trouble.

I admit I prefer watching a TV show on DVD, no commercials, just episode after episode for an entire season in a weekend. It's good, but unfortunately it doesn't keep shows on the air to keep them putting out more DVDs (Family Guy being the exception). So when people complain and want shows to get axed in the first season it just under my skin. Let the shows develop, find a balance, the story will get better. GIVE THEM TIME, not every show is a hit right off the bat like Friends or Seinfeld.

lowdown

This is noteworthy. And for your information, I've been watching Dirt since the beginning. Yup, I watched the 1hr 5 minute pilot which was played without commercials. That was my main draw to it. And yes, I'll be watching the season finale.

Originally I was going to do a pros and cons list for re-enlisting. It's about that time, 1 year left in my contract. But this drew my attention and plus now I've got to get to work. There's stuff to do!

more at 11

I hate local news. What's more, I hate the promos for local news. The Kentucky Fried Movie spoofed the local news at 11. Still, in real life, I just hate the way that they try to build suspense. They're not running a thriller movie are they? It's news, a public service (as hard as it is to imagine). "Is the drinking water safe? Find out at 11." Oh, that's great. That's five hours from now, what am I supposed to do in the meantime? Then they report that it's safe, but just a little on the high side. All that build up for that?
A couple of nights ago (before it started to snow) the news commercial came on. "Will it be an icy drive into work? Find out at 11." Well great, but if it's an icy drive in I might want to leave earlier. Staying up to 11 is not acceptable if I got to wake up at 4am to scrap ice off my car. Tell me now. Is it? No. OK, that ate up another 2 seconds of air time. In fact, if they'd just substitute the answer for "find out tonight on Fox 32, your blah blah blah" that'd solve a lot of problems. And I bet more people would watch commercials too if you insert a 10-30 second news story like that.

napalm and silly putty

Taken from George Carlin's book.

Haven't I been saying this for awhile? Eating less and exercising takes off weight. But they had to do a study to find this out. It's mathematics people. Less intake, more output equals less weight. So while we're spending money on stupid things let's do another study OK? Here's the topic, tossing a ball up into the air. Where does it go? Seriously! *bleep*ing morons!

Not enough for me. I say give the guy the chair. Or I say we try to launch him into the sun. It just pisses me off.

I like cats. This superintendent is a moron. Yeah, some people mistreats cats and some are allergic, but to take them away all together? That's not very smart is it? How about segregating cat-lovers and non-cat-lovers. I realize that they're inmates but at this facility it's not like they keep prolific child molesters or triple homicide murderers.

This is a great answer to a stupid question.

In follow up news, Shetty won. Hmm, I guess the publicity helped huh? Maybe a little guilt too? Well played! Bravo!

i can't believe it's not butter

Tonight marked the return of Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip from the winter hiatus. I love the show, it is my replacement of Sports Night, another one of Aaron Sorkin's creations. I'll admit though I never got into The West Wing because of the obvious political overtones. I liked American President and A Few Good Men. The dynamics of the show are familiar, an executive producer that's secretly in love with a lead in the show publicly. Hmm, OK, one of the main characters had a problem with drugs in the past that came to affect him in the present.
So what? I like Sports Night. Like a said, this is my modern Sports Night. Plus it's slotted in an hour block. Rocking!
So what made me blog about this right now? Well, first off, it's Amanda Peet's character's opposition to unscripted television (reality TV) and that she referred to it as "illiterate" programming. Yes! Someone else that shares my views on alternative television.
Then there's the reference throughout the show of The 48 Laws of Power and I hate to say it but Kanye West and I have that in common. I need a shower.
OK, speaking of television. A commercial caught my eye. Big surprise there huh? So, I can't remember what the product was, only that part of the audible disclaimer. Who shouldn't handle this product? Women that are pregnant or that may become pregnant. MAY BECOME? Well that's vague! So anyone woman that has hit puberty can't handle it. I guess menopausal women can handle it and very young girls. Does that about cover it? Just say that.

orlando rojas

'Sports Night' is probably my favorite show. 'Charmed' comes in a close second. Now I started watching Charmed because of Alyssa Milano but fell in love with Holly Marie Combs. Yet, something keeps drawing me to Sports Night. I don't pay much attention to sports, I'm not a fanatic or anything. I glance at the scores and I could maybe tell you who plays for what team but that's it. The characters aren't well written, but there's a lot of characters that do span across the board. If you watch his movies or shows, there is a distinction in Aaron Sorkin's writing style. "In the interest of full disclosure" is one of his key phrases that gets repeated throughout his writings. I don't mind it, and I sort of expect it. While the characters aren't well written, the script is. And what amazes me is how involved he is. Usually shows require a whole staff of writers just to write a single episode, but he manages to do it all with just a few people.
Another thing that I enjoy about Sports Night is the soundtrack. KC and the Sunshine Band, The Band, and other great musicians.
Well, that's it for me right now. I'm tired and I've got plans for tomorrow that I've got to postpone because I want to sleep in. "You're watching Sports Night on CSC, so stick around."

nothing left to do

I wonder how many twins can actually say that they were born in different years? Although they were born 2 months premature, it's still sort of cool. I know there's got to be some cases where twins are born on different days, but different years is just cool. How about different months? And what's next? Different states? It's going to be a competition! Different countries! (i.e. giving birth to one in Canada, drive south to give birth in US.) Ha. That'd just be cool. One kid is a Canadian, the other American.

See? This is the news I like.

FYI, if you didn't know, posting a blog like this is not private. *gasp* Really? You mean other people have access to this fancy-doohicky called the inter-net? And they can read this? You mean other people can read letters, put them together to form words and those words form sentences and thoughts? You mean to tell me my personal MySpace page isn't private? Oh no! What am I to do? Oh yeah, not care. I know posting things on the Internet can actually be viewed by the public. Uh, that's why I do it. It's not like I'm doing this anonymously.

Updating adoption news. The Madonna controversy. Yes, she did not adhere to established laws. The cool thing is that this controversy has stirred up some free publicity for Malawi orphans. Which was the purpose of Madonna's original trip. Well played! OK what erks me (surprised?) is the nun that sent the dad $788 (approximately) and was quoted as saying that the boy would be better off staying Malawi. No one can make a comment like that and actually mean it can they? Not unless they're psychic and predict the future. Yeah, there's nothing that can substitute a loving parent, but love just isn't enough. Love doesn't make the hunger go away, love doesn't cure AIDS, love can't keep you warm at night. Love is great, but there's so much things he'd have access to. Medicine. Education. What if little David grew up to cure AIDS? Or at least made a difference in that field. Can you then say that he would've been better off in Malawi? Yeah it sounds more like the "wait and see" theory but I can't travel into the future (yet) nor can I observe two parallel universes simultaneously (yet).
From personal experience, I can tell you that my life would be drasatically different had I not been adopted. I wouldn't have had access to many of the things I did. Plus, I certainly wouldn't have had the same experiences. But even then, I can't say for certain that I'm better off because I'm adopted. I like who I am now and that's all that matters to me. Can't change the past (yet) but maybe I can do something about the future. Probably not, because I assume that's going to take some effort and that sounds like that'd cut into my TV viewing time.

Speaking of TV viewing. The Sarah Silverman Program. I've been waiting for this for like a year. I love her, she's hot for a Jew. The stuff that spews from this comedienne's mouth is just outrageous and her delivery is what sets her apart from others. Just think of my racist comments, beliefs and jokes, and put them in the body of a hot Jew. That's her! I laughed my ass off when I watched "Jesus is Magic." Although I'm predicting that this will be another one of Comedy Central's short lived shows, I plan to enjoy it. Oh, and in the movie "The Way of the Gun" her rant (7th from the top, 'Raving Bitch') is just classic.

Sarah Silverman (on religion and kids): "Who cares? Different religions. I guess the only time it's an issue I suppose would be if you're having a baby, you have to figure out how you want to raise your baby or whatever, which still would not be an issue for us. Because you know, we'd just be honest, and say "Mommy is one of the chosen people, and Daddy believes that Jesus is magic."

proudest monkey

There's entirely too many awards shows now. When did it all happen? I saw a commercial for the Family Television Awards today which sparked my ranting. The Emmys, Oscars, People's Choice, Teen Choice, Black Film, White Film, Independent and whatever. Plus, all of the categories within each show. That's fine, I understand that. You gotta give props to the props department. What's not cool is all these awards shows. You're giving an award to recognize that it was the best for that year. There's no second chance, "Well, next week we've got the Family Television Awards so maybe we'll win that!" And how would it feel to lose all of those awards to the better show (or film)?
What really pisses me off is the Black Movie Awards. How are we supposed to bridge the racial gap if we keep putting up stupid barriers like this one? Don't give me crap about the fact that black movies are under-represented at award shows. Uh... there's a reason. THEY SUCK! It's not about the amount of money you can spend on your feature film, it's the quality. There's only so many ways to tell the same "growing up in the hood" story. Get a new hook, we understand life sucks in the hood; and if you grow up, you grow up to make a crappy movie about growing up. Boo-hoo. Cry me a river!
If we accept the Black Movie Awards then next will be the Asian Film Awards, which will branch off the Small Filipino Film Awards and the world will spin into chaos. Stop separating us award shows! Unite us!




Or at least complain about it. It takes a lot of work to protest.

Pardon me, would you have any Grey Poupon?

TV Land is doing great things. One of those things is making this list of the Top 100 catchphrases. "D'oh!" Almost all of them I recognize, not stuff from like The O.C. or any of those stupid shows.

Ah, Harry Potter's getting his freak on. Not being caught up in the Harry Potter phenomenon I thought that Cho Chang was a reference to a Sports Night episode. Jeremy was advocating a change in the top story to a Chinese swimmer named Cho Chang that was swimming something and blah blah blah. OK, so I can't remember exactly what was said but it was interesting and I used that knowledge in a crossword puzzle once.


On a personal note, go-karting rocked. I wish I had more time to get used to driving one. I have a tendency to drive a certain way. On the first lap I couldn't quite reach the pedals and had a difficult time steering. Add in the fact that I was used to driving my car, I did not do very well. In fact I did poorly. The second time though I adjusted the pedals and could reach the steering wheel better, so I did a lot better. However, there were lots of caution flags and my time suffered from those as well. The downside was that when I got in my car, I was still in the go-karting mindframe and thought that my car would handle like one which is a bad thing in a town filled with roundabouts. I didn't wreck or anything but when you take a roundabout at 35mph when the suggested speed is 15 you get some interesting results. I laughed it off and focused on staying alive.

who'd thunk it?

Aww, Britney Spears has filed for divorce from crapper (crap rapper) Kevin Federline. This is unimaginable. She's such a good girl, this is only her second divorce. And she lied to the public when she said that she was waiting until marriage to havce sex, which she continued to perpetuate for years. Him, he's a role model for people of all ages, especially those that decended from the trees of West Virginia. At least he's got a future as a... umm, redneck? I've got to say though, at least she hasn't married anyone famous. That would be a disaster huh?

Is this what I've reduced myself to? Celebrity gossip? Egads. I was actually going to write something about the elections, campaigning and mudslinging, but instead, I get sidetracked by stupid celebrity news. Oh well, I guess I'll just have to wait another two years for my piece on politics.

now that's what i call acting

Doogie Howser is gay. Let me clarify, the actor that played Doogie is gay. I liked Doogie Howser M.D. with the typing of the journal at the end of the episode. I don't think it was gay. What I don't get is why is being gay such big news? Are people really that stupid? Something like that isn't newsworthy. They're actors, the people that you relate yourself to are characters. The actors and characters are two separate entities. If I think that I relate to his character on How I Met Your Mother, that's it. I don't think that I'm Neil Patrick Harris playing Barney. So who cares if he's gay? If, however, someone were to leak his celebrity sex tape, uh, guess what? I'm not that much of an NPH fan to watch it. I'm not going to rush to download it like the Pamela Anderson ones.
I fear I may have strayed a little off the message. Being gay is not newsworthy people, at best it belongs in the sewing circle. Yes, he admitted it. Great. Of course as I sum up, I realize that by writing about the fact that NPH is gay I am perpetuating the news. Super.

Swarley out!

the news in the morning

There's nothing better than reading the news in the morning to make me smile. The news is filled with stupid people, doing stupid things and it makes you wonder 'How?' For example, one piece of news is the shooting outside of an Indianapolis strip club involving several members of the Indiana Pacers. This following their new campaign that they are changing the organization, for the better, all around from the players to the lady that works the front desk. And now the NBA commissioner is implementing change within the whole organization. Great! So now you're trying to teach morality to a bunch of people that never in a day of their life had any? Good luck with that. I guess the incentive of keeping their multi-million dollar paychecks would 'make' them go along with the change. Huh. That just sounds moronic.
Now I don't have anything against incentive programs, but shouldn't the underlying theme be a love (passion) for whatever it is you're doing? I love what I do, unfortunately I don't get paid much. After bills (rent, gas, electricity) I have about $200 for other necessities (gas for car, food, clothing, movies). To add to my income I have my Reserve drill pay, which maybe another $200 but I have to drive 206 miles (one way) to do this. So why do I do it? Because I love it. Sure, it'd be great if I could collect a million dollars a year for what I do but I don't and it doesn't stop me. I come in 30 minutes early and leave on-time or later. I work from home afterwards and even work weekends. All for the measly paycheck I collect. I say let the basketball players work for $5.25-an-hour plus tips, keep the strict dress code and the ban on firearms, and see how many keep playing. Love of the game right?
So basketball players get paid huge sums of money to entertain us. Interesting, and what's the shelf life of a basketball player? Twenty years? Thirty years? Oh well, they're set for life once they retire. Of course they'd have to be set for life when they retire at 35, it's because their f**king morons that have no marketable skills beside throwing an orange ball into an orange hoop. Woo! I said let them carry guns onto the courts, I'll watch from home. That'll make the game more interesting. I think more people would watch. A guy goes up for a dunk and BANG! Did someone get hit? No? Oh, he didn't make the dunk either. Now if a team scores a 100 points, they're the winner. Plus it'll thin out the herd once they learn how to shoot. And for the playoffs, let the audience bring in their own firearms. More motivation I say, players could be shot by the opponent's fans or if they miss a shot or pass, then one of their own fans could shoot them. How's that for incentive?